If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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