so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I got inside last night via doggy door
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
wow bdsm is so cute
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize