I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm looking forward to the release of my future best seller - "Three Words to Make Your Relationship 100% Better: Surprise Blow Jobs"
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
