i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
