So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
I would explain the ketchup stains in the bed to him but saying I just got my period is so much less embarrassing...
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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