so explain again why im purple
no
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
