Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
