No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
