Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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