Soap is not a condiment
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize
