singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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