he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
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