I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Randomize
