why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
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