btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Alive.
So much puke
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
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