I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
