i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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