her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
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