i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
