I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
