Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
