Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
