Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I'm gonna wear that dress that makes me look like a slut. You know, the one your sister got arrested in.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Randomize
