How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
