ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Randomize
