I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
