they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize