she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
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