I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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