It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
