absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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