In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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