my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
I'm sobbing to NWA
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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