What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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