She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Enjoy the penises
last night I used snow as a chaser
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