You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
