so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
