the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
i love accidental penises.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize