i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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