Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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