New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I want to fling myself into the sun
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
