yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Pants are for mortals
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
