There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
