yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
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