I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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