Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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