A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Randomize
