another moral hangover. fuck.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
