help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
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