U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
Randomize