But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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