turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
