Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize